I'm sure you're all as shocked as I am. Could it be true? How? Why? Faced with irrefutable proof, we now know beyond a shadow of a doubt, the naked truth:

A MODEL WAS CAUGHT USING DRUGS!!!

When did the moral fabric of our society break down to this level? Models, who were our beacons of light and inspiration. The last bastions of integrity and morality in this, our decaying society. One could truly say that they were more than just fashion models...they were role models.
And now this.
What have we come to? Where models are now using drugs? Who would have thought. Next thing you know, you'll have models representing other destructive forces in our society such as anorexia, chain-smoking, shallowness, materialism. One might even see a great model like Naomi Campbell throwing a tantrum. The future is dim dear readers. Very dim (like most models I know). Pray with me that the other models do not succumb to such evils. For our sake and the sake of our children.

And in related news, scientists claim sarcasm is the highest form of humour...