Ok now this is classic!

Quote of the Week!

So my director for the movie "Angel" is talking about the main character Simone's wardrobe in the movie and comes up with this classic pearl of wisdom:

"Black is a very dark colour!"

I have to hand it to him, he does have a talent for the blindingly obvious. Directors...

Don't Ever Talk To Me! Please!

So we all know Hi5 right. The online community where you get to meet friends from all over the world and form bonds that last a lifetime and...snore. You get the drift. I'm one of those passive members. I never look for friends. Why would I actively search for strangers to bother me with their boring, stupid life stories? It doesn't make sense. But being a nice guy, I still accept people's friend requests and stuff. I just never write to them. I used to feel bad but then I figured that I'm not obligated to care about total strangers. For all I know, they could be wanting to mug me or something.

So I get this one friend request from (name witheld: if she invites you, I want you to suffer). I'm looking through her profile to see what we have in common that we could talk about if she ever tracks me down and forces me into a conversation with a 9mm to my head. Somehow, I got the feeling things wouldn't work out between us.
Her favourite band in the world is Westlife!
Her favourite songs are Fool Again and Stick Wit U by PCD!
Her favourite movies include Elektra (Yes, the one with jennifer garner) and Monster in Law!
She reads Mills and Boon books.

I took one look and thought to myself, taking a bullet isn't actually that painful. If you close your eyes and think of a happy place.
If that person is reading then let me clarify : Yes, I would rather take a bullet than attempt a conversation with you. Elektra???????? Woman, I go to film school! I fight crap like that ever being produced!

Note: if you are hot, then maybe I'll think about it. Or not...

OK, so I've been in this country for like 4 weeks now and I am convinced by the day that it is totally crazy! (Worse than Brasil Julia!)
And now I have the proof:

So I was walking down the street and saw this headline in the newspapers:

Politician caught in steamy sex DVD!

OK, picture it. Are there any politicians that you would like to see in a "steamy sex video"? Paris Hilton, yes. Colin Farrel, yes. We don't mind videos of hot people getting their freak on. But can you imagine your president rolling around with a young woman and enjoying it? Picture it please.

For more on the story, go to: http://www.mg.co.za/articlePage.aspx?articleid=266989&area=/breaking_news/breaking_news__national/

Quote of the Week!

"True beauty comes from the inside - like vomit!"

Tamiko Hayter

Don't you just love it?

Quote of the Week!

If ants had noses, they would be really tiny!

So I almost died today!!! How hectic is that??
I was drinking a can of Granadilla Twist. Unbeknowst to me, a bee had managed to sneak into the can. So as I'm talking to my friends Melody and Meridian, a suck from my straw and feel something buzzing around in my mouth.
Freaking out, as one naturally would in such a situation, I immediately spat onto Melody's jeans. She of course was dismayed, to say the least. But I didn't mind. I watched gleefully as the bee that almost ended my life was now struggling to survive on the floor amidst the soda and saliva.

That made my day!